Hold On- Angus & Julia Stone

I hate him. Every time I see him, which is like looking at a blue moon, he does this to me. Its like he is stuck in my head for a few days because I saw him for a few seconds. Do I like him? Hell yes! Is there more? I just don't know. All I really want to know is why does he do this to me? Does he have some kind of interest in me? Why not just tell me??? Whoa... let's stop for a second and go back to the beginning.

Today I saw Edwin. And Edwin, for those of you who don't know (which should be just about everyone) is a guy I had a thing for back in high school. He was, what I considered to be the definition of hott: a drummer in drum-line, and in a band, nice, funny, oh so charming, and got along great with everybody. I never made a move because of a few reasons. First, and foremost, he had a girlfriend. That is just territory I don't touch. And then there were my personal reasons. Like the fact that I thought I wasn't attractive enough for him; I was, and still am on the fluffy side of the spectrum.

Well anyway, getting back to today, I saw him... again. Actually, this would be the first time this semester. I was talking to this guy I know in my math class, right outside of the class, during the break. Then he, and some friend he was with were walking right by where I was with the guy. The thing about this is that as soon as they got near me, Edwin and his friend just seemed to stop talking. I mean, come on!!!! Is that, or is that not a sign??? If it's not a sign will someone please tell me???? I need to know ASAP!!!! And, and, and, I swear... and this might not be the case, but I think I saw Edwin see me, then he just seemed to avoid looking in my direction. And I don't know what he told his friend, and I don't think I ever will... but his friend looked at me for one long second... and the just turned away; like if he was taking directions from Edwin or something.

I swear, I will never understand men... or boys... or whatever that frack they call themselves...

If you have taken the time to read my rantings, I truly thank you. And until next time, let's be free to be you and me; let's be young and free!